The Mad Dater online dating blog

The Mad Dater - An Online Dating Blog

Diatribe of a Mad Dater - "Because there's a Bastard in all of us"

Why Write a Dating Blog?
Why All The Bastard Names?



The Best Of The Mad Dater:
Girls Like you Don't Get Married
Bastards I Won't be Dating
The Threesome That Never Was
Player Pie- A Dating Recipe
Dear Condom Manufacturers
The Bastard I'll Always Love - Hip Hop
Break Up Stages
Seinfeld's "The Thing"
Bastard Affective Disorder
November Sweeps
The Oh No You Did Not Girls
The Punisher Bastard
Fiction: The Original Bastard

The More Introspective Mad Dater
Still Missing My Dad
The Night My Mother Disappeared
Now My Brother & I Don't Speak
My Mother Was a Cheater
My Dad's Funeral Was a Joke
The Introspective Mad Dater


Email The Mad Dater

Dating Blog Archives:


Copyright Notice:

© 2003-2010, The Mad Dater.
All written content on this blog
is copyright protected

As if you care about my dating life! But since you're reading this dating blog....

Friday, February 03, 2006
I've Been Trying to Write This Blog Post for the Last Four Days 


This is an archived post. Please read my more recent posts to this dating blog


So let me just lay the facts out for you right up front:

Mothers Who LeaveMothers Who Leave
My mother left us a few days before my junior year of college was to start. I wasn't home when she left; I had been out playing Grown Folks Games with the guy I was dating at the time. He drove me home at about 3 am and when we turned the corner onto my block, my brother was standing in the street yelling something. When I asked him what was wrong, he told me that my mother had left. And that would be the last time that we would hear from her for about 3 years.

When I tried to write this blog post on Tuesday, I wrote about how my parents were very Old School. Old School, as in boys can do as they please and girls must be GOOD. Old School, as in my brother was having sex in our house since Junior High and I wasn't even allowed to have a boy sit anywhere but our dining room table even when I got home from college.

When I tried to write this blog post on Wednesday, I wrote about the summer before my Junior year of college being officially known of as: My Summer of Being Grown. I'd do what I wanted, I'd stay out as late as I liked and I'd spend the night at my man's house as I wished. The reason I gave my parents for being able to do what I wanted when I wanted was simple: "I'm an adult now. You weren't worrying about me when I was away at school, why should you be sweating what I'm doing now?". But if I was really grown, I wouldn't have cried like a baby almost every night for the next four months; missing a woman who I claimed to dislike.

When I tried I write this blog post on Thursday, I wrote about how quite the street we lived on was with the exception of weekend mornings, when someone would blast what my dad called "music to work to". We spent most every weekend working on the house as a family. My brother and I cleared the weeds out of the side garden, my mother tended the rose bushes in the front yard and my dad would mow the lawns. We had a lot of happy times on that quiet street. But now when I think of that quiet street I always remember my brother's yelling at 3 am and his answer to my question when I wound down the window to my boyfriend's car: "Ma's gone"

I'd be lying if I said it doesn't still make my stomach hurt to think about that summer and those words. No matter how long I take to write this, no matter what story I try to tell about that summer, nothing changes the facts: My mom left us in the middle of the night. And I'd be lying if I said that I didn't want to postpone this post indefinitely, so here it finally is....


This is part of a series of Wednesday posts to my dating blog called: The More Introspective Mad Dater. See Also: And We Said We Wouldn't Be Like Them, Those Three Little Words Were All I Had & Last Friday's Dating Blog Post Was Supposed to be Funny.

The Mad Dater - Later kids

Let Me Know What You Think. Leave a Comment:
Permanent Post Link | 0 comments


I've Been Trying to Write This Blog Post for the Last Four Days - The Mad Dater Dating Blog
New Posts From The Mad Dater