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As if you care about my dating life! But since you're reading this dating blog....

Wednesday, August 04, 2004
Seinfeld's "The Thing" 


This is an archived post. Please read my more recent posts to this dating blog


AKA... If my life were a "Seinfeld" episode... Playing the part of Elaine is the Mad Dater:
Jerry: So this young bastard, "I Need Love Bastard”, he’s still around? You saw him twice this weekend? I thought it was over.

Elaine: Ehh....

Jerry: Come on Elaine. You know how these things go: you meet, you have way too much sex, you come to your senses, yadda, yadda, yadda, it’s over. Unless of course….

Elaine: Unless what?

Jerry: Unless he did The Thing.

Elaine: The Thing?

Jerry: You know The Thing. The Thing!

Kramer: The Thing with his Thing.

Elaine: Oh! The Thing. Yes, he did The Thing.

Jerry: Doing The Thing always extends the shelf life of a fling.

Elaine: Well The Thing or no thing. It’s over now.

George: I think I did The Thing once.

Elaine: You did The Thing?

George: Can’t I do the thing? I can do The Thing!

Elaine: Ok, George you can do The Thing.

Jerry: So did you do The Thing or do you just think you did The Thing?

George: Well this girl I was dating told me I did The Thing. But she also told me that
“Balding” was the new hot look.

Kramer: I knew a girl who did The Thing.

Jerry: Women can’t do The Thing. Physically impossible.

Elaine: I can pee standing up and George can do The Thing, so anything is possible.

Kramer: Believe me Jerry she did The Thing. She did The Thing . Va - va - voom.

George: Hey, I gotta go; I gotta do a thing with my dad. Not that type of thing, you know what I mean.

Kramer: The thing with the pantyhose?

George: You know about the thing with the pantyhose?

Kramer: Yes, it was my idea. Ingenious.

George: You and your bright ideas Kramer. Now because of you I gotta do this thing with my dad and the pantyhose. Let’s go.

(Kramer and George exit)

Jerry: He stayed around this long; he must have done something other than The Thing?

Elaine: No. I was just too lazy to move on. Could ya blame me? He was doing The Thing after all.

Jerry: Want to get something to eat?

Elaine: All this talk of The Thing, I have to sublimate.
Fin

The Mad Dater - Later kids

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