The Mad Dater Online Dating Blog: The Bastard I'll Always Love

As if you care about my dating life! But since you're reading this dating blog....

Tuesday, July 27, 2004
The Bastard I'll Always Love - Hip Hop

This is an archived post. Please read my more recent posts to this dating blog

Transfixed. My brother and I stood on the playground at the community center awed by your sound Hip-Hop. We didn't hear the people teasing us for pretending our pajamas were "real clothes". My seven year old ears were only concentrating on how your rhythm made the the big kids dance. My cousin told us you were rap music and that he had some records he wanted to play for us. I fell in love.

After that introduction we were inseparable - you, me and my brother. Remember how we used to hear you at The Skate Key and my brother broke his nose trying to pop lock on roller skates to Planet Rock? Of course that never stopped him from thinking he was a break-dancer; and I became his crew’s official “Cardboard Carrier" and "Boom Box Holder." It was cool though; because when I put down the cardboard so they could dance, I got to hold you close to my ears; balancing the boom box on my shoulder all b-girl style.

When our dad made us write a letter to him listing the reasons why we should get an allowance, the number one reason on both our lists: "To buy records.” As soon as Thursday came around (aka: Allowance Day) we would run to the record store on Boston Road and spend all of our money on you. Well not all of it; we had to spend some on Now & Laters and Jingles.

We lived for you, but sometimes you could be dirty. Like the time you made us choose between Big Daddy Kane’s - “Long Live The Kane” and Eric B& Rakim's - “Paid in Full”. We only had $10.00 between us, so yeah, that was dirty. We ended up buying Big Daddy Kane and to this day, my brother and I still debate that decision.

Trouble. Yeah, you got me and my brother into a lot of trouble. Like the time we bought NWA's – “Straight Outta Compton”. Just as we were halfway through “F___ The Police”, moms came home and she didn’t even yell at us in the Jamaican accent that only came out when she was angry. She simply walked in the door, looked at us, took the tape out, stepped on it and threw out the window. I'm still salty about that one.

Then there was that time when my brother's rap group, INFLICT was doing that talent show in New Rochelle and we missed the last bus back to the Bronx. They won, but we had to walk home all those miles back to the Bronx. Do you know the only thing that made the walk easier? Singing all the word's to Slick Rick's – “The Great Adventures of Slick Rick" as we walked. When I hear Mona Lisa, I still think about that night.

But no matter where I went, I took you with me. During my three hour trip up to Amherst for the first time, I listened to an old tape of you from DJ Red Alert's show when he first played EPMD's - "Please Listen to My Demo". And on that first day of freshman year, I tried to find you at the only record store in the town of Amherst. Yes, I still have that cassette single of Black Moon's - "Who Got The Props" (when they were still on Nervous Records). Remember cassette singles? Remember Nervous Records?

Even though I cheated on you in college with Classic Rock and Jazz you were still there when I needed you. Like that time those bastards didn't give me those tickets to UMass' Midnight Madness (man, they had a team that year - Camby, Dingle, Bright....) you came through for me. Remember how I called up UMass' radio station and had them dedicate Onyx's – "Bichasniguz" to them? That one still makes me laugh.

Thank you. I don't think I ever thanked you for introducing me to one of my best friends "He Could Be My Brother" (aka - Infinite - if you're in Atlanta check out his video show: Beats &Lyrics). I smile when I think about how excited he was to get Faze-o's–“Riding High” on vinyl. After listening to that, we all sat around and listened to The Roots -"Do You Want More?!!!??!" (BTW: ?uestlove will be DJing at MJQ on Saturday!!) and imagined what it would be like to live in the 70's and listen to records all the time. Remember that time he DJ'd that Spellman Party and got so tired of getting retarded requests that he told the crowd it was "time for some education," and proceeded to play the entire Pete Rock- "Soul Survivor" Album? I laughed my ass off. Thanks again

Now that I’m thirty, people try to tell me that I'm too old for you. Those who “don't know” look at me sideways when they hear you coming out of my headphones. They don't know that even a thirty-year-old woman in heels and a skirt can love hip-hop. I’ll still keep defending you when They- those who've only heard one Puff Daddy song - swear that you're only about samples and refer them to just about any Premier beat for an education on: The Art of The Sample. (BTW: Premier will be DJing at Formosa Thursday: RSVP for free admission) And those who “do know” - the young ones, the wanna be MC’s ones - they give me their demo tapes hoping they make my head nod they way you do.

So even though I rarely spend money on you these days (preferring to spend my money on Classic Rock and House), and listening to you on the radio gives a headache and seeing your latest “Video Hoe" video makes me turn off the television, I still love you.

"No need to spit in the cypher to show you I'm a lifer for Rap” – De La Soul – "Bionix”