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As if you care about my dating life! But since you're reading this dating blog....

Tuesday, July 13, 2004
The Bastard Emmy's 

The Academy of Bastard Arts and Sciences  presents the first annual: The Bastard Emmy's :
  • Best Young Bastard in a Recurring Role:
    "I Need Love Bastard":   For discovering my G-Spot (which I thought was a myth) and you all wondered why I kept him around so long. Mmmm, and to think he's so young....
  • Best portrayal of a Villain by a Bastard:
    "No Sex In The Champagne Room Bastard":  The fact that there's a whole blog that I started because of his bastardly ways says enough. He's the hands down winner. He'll probably send me some cryptic email, now that I mentioned him in this blog.
  • Best Bastard in a Variety Show or Special:
    "Oh You Can't Call Nobody Bastard":  For his magical disappering act.  When I saw him a few weeks ago when Jazzanova was at MJQ I couldn't even remember his name.  It took him calling me last week to refresh my memory. Yes, you read right, he did call. PS:  it's easy to forget a bastard's name when the sex was so blah.

  • Best Bastard in a Reality Show:
    "Dr. Love Bastard":   For his ability to be a homie, lover,  friend.  Yes, kids -  you can have sex with a friend and then stop having sex and still be friends. Now that's real/
  • Best Bastard in a Drama:
    "Serve Me Well/Mr. Touchy-Touchy Bastard":  For that whole episode when the Crazy Chick/Trick intrerrupted our date.  Then after telling me how crazy she was and how pissed he was, he still dated her. Hmm... in case y'all were wondering why you hadn't heard about him....
  • Best Guest Persormance by a Bastard in a Drama:
    "Blue Mountain Bastard":  For the whole Baking Bastard thing.  I gotta call it a "Guest performance" since a 4 minute "performance" can't be called a full show.  ' Nuff said. 
  • Best Bastard in a Comedy:
    "Lay A Wet One One Me Bastard": The thoughts that went through my head when he kissed me in MJQ still make me laugh.  Good thing people can't read minds.
  • Best Guest Persormance by a Bastard in a Comedy:
    "It's a Wrap Bastard": For thinking that I was actually gonna fool around with him in his restaurant.  Come on kid.

The Mad Dater - Later kids

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