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As if you care about my dating life! But since you're reading this dating blog....

Monday, March 01, 2004
The (D.U.M.B.) Awards 

The Bastard Entertain Network (BEN) presents the first annual: Dramatic Unscripted Moments in Bastardy (D.U.M.B.) Awards - aka The Dummy's
  • Best Actress in a Drama of Her Own Creation:
    The Angry Trick for her portrayal of a hysterical girl, locked out of her apartment with no one to turn but "Serve Me Well Bastard" . She cried, she called (over 50 times), she banged repeatedly on the door for 40 minutes. She even enlisted her brother to call "Serve Me Well Bastard" and leave a message pretending to be a friend who needed to get in. (Now if The Angry Trick was really locked out of her apartment, why didn't she just go to her brother's house?) Now that's drama.

  • Best Actor in a Drama of His Own Creation:
    "Serve Me Well Bastard": For not simply opening the door after he looked out and saw it was The Angry Trick (Chick). Instead he let this drama continue for another 30 minutes. Talk about DUMB! What did he think she would be happy when she saw him in there with me?!

  • Best Cameo by a Cutie in a Drama:
    "I Need Love Bastard" (The Cutie Iranian Roommate): For coming home and letting The Angry Trick in, who was now hysterically about being "locked out of her apartment".

  • Best Unscripted Moment in a Drama:
    The I Want To Be Alone Moment : This was the moment The Angry Trick took her hysterical routine straight to "Serve Me Well Bastard's" room and closed the door. I guess she wanted me to know that she wasn't there to see "I Need Love Bastard", and that she had it like that.

  • The Kelis "Caught Out There" Award:
    "Serve Me Well Bastard's": Player, you are so caught out there. You obviously didn't take what you read in my "Player Pie" recipe to heart. If so, you would know how to mange your chicks better Bro.
And while she wasn't a winner of any awards that night, The Mad Dater was quoted as saying:
"I was just happy to be there to witness that grand spectacle and laugh my ass off. Most of all, I'm glad that "Serve Me Well Bastard" knows that I was gonna roast him here. And boy does he deserve it! "

The Mad Dater - Later kids

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