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As if you care about my dating life! But since you're reading this dating blog....

Thursday, January 15, 2004
Bastard Recovery 

Because my Bastard Affective Disorder (B.A.D.) had gotten worse, I was really excited when the I-Three's (My Inner Voices) said that they signed me up for a group called B.A.R.. With a name like B.A.R. I'm thinking, this must be one of those Atlanta social bar hopping groups like The Square Hatter's or The Wednesday Night Drinking Club. I was so wrong.

I realized my mistake when I picked up a pamphlet at the group's headquarters entitled: "The Twelve Steps To Bastard Addiction Recovery". Had my disorder gotten so bad, that my inner voices had an intervention without me and decided that I needed professional help? This is a drastic measure, since the only thing I had heard about this group was that it was cult-like and well known for turning women into lesbians. (Well if all the lesbians are as cute as the two who were buying me drinks at Après Diem, would that be so wrong?)

There'll be no going out, (yes Witchy Woman a girl is on lockdown), no phone calls, no bastards and no sex (an obvious by-product of no bastards) for The Mad Dater for an undertermined time. (Hey if anyone goes to ATLart [04], The Elliot Smith Tribute or The Lunch Box Memories Exhibit , please send me an email at Inmate#8675309 care of The Bastard Recovery Institute and let me know how they were.) The one good this is that they haven't cut off my internet privileges. So that means I'll still be able to bastard hunt virtually at impersonals.com , Nerve.com and Friendzy (I would say Friendster, but it never seems to work.)

In my last act as a Bastard Addicted Woman I did however vote for three cutie's at Creative Loafing's - Valentine's Day Lust List: "Poetic Bastard" - because even sweet guys need love - plus he has great hair, "Serve Me Well Bastard" - because I fronted on that, and my long time crush Andisheh Nouraee - who I'm sure will be disqualified since he writes for Creative Loafing).

Well I gotta go folks, I have a group meeting to get to: Bastards - more than just a Big D#!% and a Smile

The Mad Dater - Later kids

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