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Diatribe of a Mad Dater - "Because there's a Bastard in all of us"

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Why All The Bastard Names?



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Girls Like you Don't Get Married
Bastards I Won't be Dating
The Threesome That Never Was
Player Pie- A Dating Recipe
Dear Condom Manufacturers
The Bastard I'll Always Love - Hip Hop
Break Up Stages
Seinfeld's "The Thing"
Bastard Affective Disorder
November Sweeps
The Oh No You Did Not Girls
The Punisher Bastard
Fiction: The Original Bastard

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Still Missing My Dad
The Night My Mother Disappeared
Now My Brother & I Don't Speak
My Mother Was a Cheater
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The Introspective Mad Dater


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As if you care about my dating life! But since you're reading this dating blog....

Thursday, December 18, 2003
I've Been A Bad, Bad Girl...  

And Not In The Good Way! Spank Me Daddy! (I know - I'm silly for that one!)

So let's play catch up...

... after his use of metaphors (See comments section of Last Post) I have to call "Serve Me Well Bastard"! You know similes get me sticky... and metaphors... well I'll just keep that to myself! LOL! Granted he's a cutie with a brain (yummy), but I really just want thim to explain that metaphor to me. I just love that a Bastard finally has the guts to post in the comments section! Witchy Woman comes through again.

..."Crack Bastard" , sent me his number today... so I have to call the boy shortly. (The technicalities of the name "Crack Bastard" are too hard to explain here... something about jet engines, cracks and engineering... if he just said he smokes crack, I would have at least knew what that was talking about.) Yes kids, I finally got around to responding to emails from this Friendster Bastard. Your boy is hilarious. He even... drumroll... admits he's a Bastard ! (You know admitting your problem is the first step...). 'Till we get a chance to meet I'll be reading his blog: Shelbinator.com.

... some of you have been wondering about "Where'd Ya Get That Bastard?" . Why haven't you heard more about him especially since he's cute and polite? Why haven't I seen more of him? His new name should explain it: "Throw Ya Guns In The Air Bastard". Why the new name? OK, last time we went out, how 'bout there was a loaded gun in his glove compartment. At first I was thinking "must be the gimlets, because I know I didn't just see a gun." Now granted this is The South; home of the Gun Rack In The Back - but this is Atlanta. He confirmed what I saw when he started telling me about something he's planning; something about a big event? While I was hoping he said he was planning some type of party, (I woulda been like "Ohh can I be down. Do you need me to bring liquor?") he was talking about some type of riot! Riots? Come on, all that dirt and gunpowder can't be good for the skin. Look at Saddam! Plus I'm involved in something more volatile than war... dating! See ya sweetie...

So as you can see I've been busy.... and sick! Yes, I know everyone is mad... Seems I can't return phone calls, emails, comment on blogs, etc. lately. At first I was gonna send out emails to everyone... but then again I never got around to it.... but I will I promise...

The Mad Dater - Later kids

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