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As if you care about my dating life! But since you're reading this dating blog....

Friday, October 24, 2003
The Thrill is Gone 

The sounds of Summer... Naked butts being smacked by sweaty palms, heavy breathing playing in time to heads bobbing between laps, screams of pleasure muffled beneath hands while grabbing quickies in alleyways like cats in heat ... Too bad it's fall and I only hear that on Cable Television.

Instead of feeling all "Real Sex XX..." (what the heck number are they on now any way?), I feel all CBS on a Sunday Night- and damn if I'm not all Hallmark Special'd out! I'm really getting tired of all this girlie, introspective, over-analytical (I see why 'anal' begins that word ) crap that comes with being monogamous.

....Which brings us to the case of : " Oh You Can't Hold My Hand Bastard". For some time now I've been trying to come up with a new name for good 'ole "El Diablo Bastard". That bastard name just stuck, because only the Devil himself could get The Mad Dater to settle down.

So we went for a walk last night and each time I tried to hold the bastard's hand (which was numerous), he pushed my hand away. Holding hands to me is a sign of comfort and acknowledgement. Hence the new name: " Oh You Can't Hold My Hand Bastard"- You can bang but you can't hold hands.

Granted, he did hug me lots and gave me the required a$$ smacks- but every move he made smelled of sex (not to be confused with the musky odor of Eau d' Booty Bumping). Now don't start tripping, I know I was all "Sex in The City" the other night, mad because the bastard left without "breaking me off proper like" the other night. But sometimes you just want someone to hold your hand. Yes I can be girlie too; and it's killing me.

Now keep in mind it wasn't even like we were on busy streets; so this definitely doesn't qualify as PDA. We were walking through my neighborhood. Now if you know The Highlands, you know no one is on the streets on a Wednesday night except the lone jogger who has to get their evening constitutional in (I feel all Tom Sawyer saying constitutional)

Well I guess it's like I've known all along- ocne you have sex, the romance disappears. I didn't even tell ya boy that my period was over. I was all "goodnight"s and "syonara"s.

The Mad Dater - Later kids

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