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Diatribe of a Mad Dater - "Because there's a Bastard in all of us"

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Girls Like you Don't Get Married
Bastards I Won't be Dating
The Threesome That Never Was
Player Pie- A Dating Recipe
Dear Condom Manufacturers
The Bastard I'll Always Love - Hip Hop
Break Up Stages
Seinfeld's "The Thing"
Bastard Affective Disorder
November Sweeps
The Oh No You Did Not Girls
The Punisher Bastard
Fiction: The Original Bastard

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Still Missing My Dad
The Night My Mother Disappeared
Now My Brother & I Don't Speak
My Mother Was a Cheater
My Dad's Funeral Was a Joke
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As if you care about my dating life! But since you're reading this dating blog....

Saturday, August 30, 2003
The BWA's - Big Bastard Weekend Awards  

In honor of all the blogs written about the VMA's I' thought I'd give out awards for The First Annual Big Bastard Weekend :
Best Use Of The Ass Grab in a Club Award: Dr. Feel Good Bastard for grabbing my ass at Whiskey Peach and then giving me a really good massage to make up for his transgression. You can always make a place for a Bastard with good hands

The ISSy Would Love You Award: The Punisher Bastard (See post: Be Verry, Verry Quiet) His Bastard name and that post should enlighten you as to why he gets that award - I'll talk more about that later this week.

Lamest Excuse for not Calling Award: It's a Wrap Bastard for telling me what basically sounded like Blah blash, blazey skippy about all the reasons why he didn't call me - he missed "The sun was in my eyes"

I Know I Haven't Called You in a Long Time But... Award: Oh Brother Where At Thou Bastard who calls me once evey few months on Sunday mornings for no apparent reason - we've never even been on a date or had a conversation longer that 3 minutes - go figure...

The No Show Award - To Trekkers Bastard for not showing up at Apres Diem ... he gets a pass because he was allready drunk - and The Mad Dater can't resist an accent!

It's About Time You Stopped Being Flakey Award: To "Bastard Gigante" - for finally hanging out with me and not flaking out on Sunday.

Best Impersation of a Bastard I Used to Date Award: The Punisher Bastard - though he's half Turkish and Half Italian - I swear he could be Crazy Turkish Guy's brother. Though he's a much better driver -(I should know, he drove me to his apartment at The Metropolis after drinks at Apres Diem - BTW: The Metropolis looks like a hotel from the inside and not in a good way.

Lifetime Bastard Achievenemt Award: No Sex In The Champagne Room Bastard - for calling me and telling me that he hasn't slept in his bed since the last time that I spent the night - this is like two months ago - I was like I don't believe you. Who the hell would sleep on their futon when they can sleep on their bed. And who the hell would make their bed into some sacred space especially when we never sleop togeteher.

And Finally.....

Most Promising New Bastard Award: Bob Marley Bastard - for sincerity and allowing me to bail on a date with him. (Quietly it's for being such a cutie and for looking like bob Marley too - and he's a Capricorn also - always a plus)

The Mad Dater - Later kids

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